How Long Will I Feel This Way?

(10/20/22) Our trip to Paris is now only six days away. Every six months when we go, well in advance, I spend time researching all of the details to ensure that the trip goes smoothly. And each time, I discover new tools, and undercover new sources of information designed to make the voyage more comfortable, to improve our confidence as travelers -- the best non-stop flight, the most reliable and cost-effective transfer connections, fascinating cultural exhibitions, live music, sought-after bars and restaurants and tantalizing nightlife.

What is remarkable to me is that throughout the many hours of preparation for our transatlantic voyages, time after time, my feeling never wavers. This thrill, this sense of childish elation, the same feeling that I have felt since childhood…about France. I suppose I could ask why. My family jokes that I was French in another life. Whatever the causes, the effect of my France obsession is that we now own a share in an apartment in one of the most remarkable buildings in Paris. A building steeped in 700 years of Paris life, that has witnessed countless generations of Parisians passing up and down its narrow street, the wealthy, the destitute, in times of peace and war. The location is beyond perfect, right in the center of the Marais -- the culturally rich neighborhood that has gone from aristocratic upscale to Jewish ghetto to bobo chic. I honestly couldn’t believe our luck; I still can’t.

When I saw the email in Spring 2019, my pulse quickened. The weekly newsletter from Adrian Leeds, real estate consultant extraordinaire, described the tiny, yet exquisitely designed apartment, for sale using a method known as Fractional Ownership. This method turns what is unattainable for “average” people like us into a reality, a chance to own a piece of an apartment in Paris!

The time was right -- Bob’s mother had passed a year earlier and left him a bit of money, enough for us to take this leap -- so we did. Two-week visits, twice a year – suddenly, we were part-time Parisians! To be perfectly French about it, what an unexpected embarrass de richesse! After the real estate transaction closed in December 2019, and after suffering the disappointment of being denied our first, second and third opportunities to travel as a result of COVID, we finally made our first trip to the Parisian apartment in July 2021. I was indescribably ecstatic! The experience was a dream realized, as we settled into our new abode and acquainted ourselves with our new neighborhood, delightfully replete with restaurants, bars, museums, and at least one jazz club.

A second trip in spring of this year, and we had definitely hit our stride. We are now preparing for our third visit, and the question now has become: how best to fill our time? And, more importantly in my mind: how to keep Bob interested and invested? The harsh reality is, my husband loves to travel, thrives on new experiences, but a natural born lover of France like me he is not. He was thrilled at first to see me so happy when the opportunity to buy the share arose. Our first visit was imbued with that same enthusiasm. Now, however, he has revealed to me that, at the age of 62, he is anxious to continue exploring other parts of the world, while we’re still active.

Paris, and even France in general, does not clearly fit into Bob’s vision for future years of travel adventure. Despite his desire to see me happy, he is ready to consider selling up. The money we could raise by selling our share in the Paris apartment could buy us so many more trips all over the world. To say that I’m torn over this dilemma is an understatement. All I keep thinking is, how could I bear to let it go? And will I ever stop feeling this way – about Paris? He assures me that we won’t make any sudden decisions, that it’s just food for thought for now. But I know the time is coming for me to let go of this tiny haven in a place that I love -- to give up a piece of my lifelong dream.